June 2023

June 2023 - Chemo Symptoms are in full swing, and blessings and gratitude to those close to me!

I started the month of June preparing for another round of chemotherapy. I was getting used to the routine of it all. I just start to feel a little better and it's time to do it all again. Every 3 weeks. I am amazed at how our bodies cope with it all and how well we can recover. Our bodies naturally heal themselves. I am so grateful for that.

Chemo goes everywhere with you… even to the loo!

I was definitely noticing some of the side effects that I had been told about. My fingernails were very dry and lifting a little. My skin and fingers were sore. My feet were increasingly cold and starting to feel numb at times. This was due to Peripheral Neuropathy. My bald head was patchy so I had my 3rd headshave on 4th June as I thought it best to keep it shaved. Strange as it seems there was a tiny bit of hair growth but it was also still coming out in places.

I had constant underlying nausea and was grateful when one of my chemo nurses suggested 'sea bands' she said she had used them when she was expecting and they helped her feel less queasy. They worked for me too. Who knew, little elasticated bands of wool on your wrists can stop you feeling sick.

My new foodie best friends were rice pudding and corned beef. My taste was very strange.

Although I was feeling so tired, my sleep was being interrupted by my side effects but, luckily, I knew how to get myself back to sleep easily so, in total, I think I was getting more than enough sleep.

My 4th round of chemotherapy was on the 6th June and I treated my very special friend to a birthday treat by asking her to be my support for this round. It was her birthday but such was her devotion to me, she happily drove me to and from the hospital and spent the day with me. We had such a wonderful day full of laughter and she helped me relax by putting our favourite calming music on the radio. She was brilliant at distracting me from what was actually happening to me while huge amounts of toxic chemicals were being pumped into my body.

I treasure these moments of pure love and compassion. It can't be easy for people that love and care about you to witness it all. They go through all the worry, fear and anxiety that the patients do but don't always get the recognition, and certainly don't get the care and attention. In my case these people are the true angels in all of this, caring for me so well without adding the weight of their own emotions to mine. I am blessed to have such wonderful people in my life... and am very grateful.

The day after my chemotherapy infusions I have the delightful task of giving myself an injection.

This in itself isn't difficult but psychologically I found this extremely hard.

I was tutored on how to do it at my first chemotherapy session and thought it would be a breeze. You have to inject into your tummy which is easy for me to do. My tummy is easy to find and there is plenty of flesh so it doesn't hurt at all but, the thought of actually putting a needle into my own flesh is very hard for me to get my head around. I used all my calming skills and a little bit of meditation to get myself through this.

During this month I was blessed to keep receiving gifts from people to make me feel more loved and I even managed to do a couple of interviews on Zoom with 2 of my good friends and supporters who encouraged me to talk publicly about what I was going through. One of them was about leaning into our feelings and navigating fear and the other was about drinking alcohol. I had not touched a drop of alcohol since my treatment started as I wanted to look after my liver during this toxic time and, to be honest, it didn't taste nice and didn't sit well in my tummy... a strange way to give up drinking alcohol but I chose to see it as a bonus.

My 5th Round of Chemo towards the end of June. I was accompanied with another good friend, Lesley.

I had initially wanted to hide my diagnosis and treatment but, as I say, I was encouraged to talk about it and it proved to be hugely beneficial to my own acceptance of what was going on for me. I learnt a lot about myself through talking about it to others and I know that it has helped others too as I have had some beautiful messages from people that have heard my podcasts and commented that what I have shared has helped them.

I ended the month of June much as I started it with another round of chemotherapy, again, accompanied by a very good friend.

I am very lucky and very grateful.

In my work I always advise clients to practice the calming tips, techniques and coping strategies I teach them when they are in a calm, safe place so that they will have them ready to use whenever they need them.

I am so glad that I had my 'toolbox' of techniques ready for me to dip into. It helped me get back to sleep when I needed it, manage the side effects of my treatment and ease the fear and anxiety that I was feeling so often. I have learnt a lot through this which is why I am so passionate about sharing my experience so that I can help others.

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If you’d like to learn more about how I can help you, please visit my website and YouTube channel. There, I share more about my cancer journey and how my experiences have fuelled my passion for supporting others through similar challenges.

Please feel free to contact me directly if you have any questions or simply need a listening ear.

Here are details to my YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/@CalmerSelfCoach

Website: www.calmerself.co.uk

Text: 07856 169 186

Email: nadine@calmerself.co.uk